YUCK! The ranch has been taken over by love this Valentine’s Day, and I for one am not for it! Take a look at what I’ve been having to deal with all day- all the classic symptoms of love have been exhibited by one or more of my comrades… really guys?!

Love sickness.

It’s enough to make this donkey lose his appetite! OK, well not that bad- nothing could be that bad; but the cases are pretty severe, and I can’t wait till it all ends!

Similar mannerisms.

Frolicking and loss of person style.

We love pow pow days here at the ranch- I personally love them because I enjoy  rolling around in the snow to cool myself off… because I’m hot. What? Do you have any idea how much fur a Sicilian Donkey has- it’s like being in a broiler all the time! Anyway, here are a couple of my favorite scenes from today’s fresh powder day:

And the weather was just perfect for snowshoeing and cross country skiing- oh no! not me! Don’t be silly! I spent most of the day napping-what? The wranglers really spread out the hay piles at breakfast this morning, so I had to wander around for my food more than usual.

Maybe some folks will be able to find me while they’re here over Presidents’ weekend though- after all, the Petey Paparazzi promotion is going to be going all the way through the summer! Check out our Facebook Page for more info on that.

Happy pow p

Well, Tim Tebow may have lost in Saturday’s game against the Patriots (it took everybody at the ranch a while to get over that one, admittedly, but I heard the menu below helped people eat their sorrows away), but we still love him around here (yes, yes, even me, though heaven only knows why… I Tebowed while saying that, by the way).  So, while everybody else talks about Tebow Time and last minute come from behind wins  in what was almost a Cinderella season, I’d like to take a look back at our Tebow Time here at the ranch… I can hear the screaming women now. The one thing I’d like to state is this- I seem to have been cut out of each of the pictures, as you’ll notice… I have a call in to my agent (who may not be my agent for much longer if this type of thing keeps happening).

But anyway, if you’re still feeling blue about the Bronco’s loss, or if you’re in need of a ranch style menu to give you a little bit of the C Lazy U at home (or to munch on while you salivate on the images below), here you have it:

Start With: Bruschetta

1. Preheat your oven to the broiler setting (yes, it has a purpose, at last!).
2. In a large bowl, combine roma tomatoes, sun-dried tomatoes (make sure you buy them in oil if possible), garlic, olive oil, vinegar, basil, salt, and pepper. Allow the mixture to sit for 10 minutes.
3. Cut a French baguette into 3/4-inch slices. On a baking sheet, arrange the baguette slices in a single layer. Broil for 1 to 2 minutes, until slightly brown.
4. Divide the tomato mixture evenly over the baguette slices. Top the slices with mozzarella cheese (we like a combo of  fresh mozzarella in water, and bagged shredded mozzarella here!) .
5. Broil for 5 minutes, or until the cheese is melted.

Main Course: Dijon Pork Chops with Corn Bread Stuffing and Ranch Style Green Beans

1. Preheat oven to 350 degrees. Heat oil in a 12-inch skillet over medium heat. Add 1 medium onion, finely chopped, and 3 stalks of celery, also finely chopped; cook, stirring occasionally, until onion is translucent, 6 to 8 minutes. Add 1/3 cup of diced chicken liver to the veggies; cook, stirring, until beginning to brown, about 4 minutes.
2. While browning the above, heat 3 cups of chicken broth on the stove, and coarsely crumbled 6 cups of cornbread in a large bowl (we realize that cornbread may not be around all the time in your house the way it is here- we live on a ranch, so it’s basically one of our 4 main food groups, so you can cheat and buy and make cornbread from a box)
3. When liver is browned, add that,  plus the heated chicken broth to the bowl of cornbread, and stir.
4. Finely, add 2 tablespoons of fresh chopped sage to the cornbread mixture, stir, and transfer contents of bowl into a shallow baking dish. Cook at 350 for 40-45 minutes (the more shallow your baking dish, the less time it will take)

1. In a bowl, combine plain breadcrumbs, salt and pepper.
2. Spread a thin layer of Dijon mustard onto entire por chop, and then roll each in the bread crumb mixture
3. Fry each chop in a skillet of HOT oil (be sure NOT to over cook- only 3-4 minutes per side if you’re serving  them right away, less if they’ll have to sit and be re-heated in the oven)

1. In a pan, heat a few tablespoons of oil, on low, and add onion slices (we like lot’s of onion here… much to the dismay of the ladies that work with us, I’ve heard), and later, when the onion is almost done (this is a SLOW, LOW process, in which you will be “caramelizing” the onions) bacon bits
2. Boil green beans in water until somewhat tender, drain, and combine with the onion/bacon mixture (getting the oil in with the combo is ok- it adds to the bacon flavor of  things… and we LOVE bacon!

With a menu like this and the following pictures, the only thing this donkey can say is: Enjoy!

Tim Tebow, poses, arms crossed, in one of the saddle rooms of the C Lazy U Ranch barn

Tim Tebow get's ready to throw a pass as the C Lazy U Ranch herd stampedes behind him.

And I’ve been told that I’ve saved the best for last:

Tim Tebow bares his chest for this pass play in the C Lazy U Ranch hay meadow.

But honestly, I don’t see what people see in him… what does he have that I don’t:

A very attractive donkey in the same meadow as Tim Tebow- where's my billboard?!

That’s right, eat your hearts out.

Thanks so much to everyone that came to stay at the ranch this holiday season- I call it the perfect storm because there really was just SO much going on (you were a very active, fun group!), but we love it that way and wouldn’t change a thing! We are so lucky and honored to have you all as part of our ranch family!

As an FYI for those people out there that weren’t able to make it this holiday season: we are already nearly full for Christmas 2012, and it looks that New Year’s will be following suit here pretty soon. If you are interested in the holidays, please make sure you call and put your name on the waiting list, and we’ll get you in as we can!

Lastly, please make sure to check out our Facebook page for a great picture account for each of the 2 major holidays this winter!

Happy New Year to everyone!

T”was the night before Christmas and all through the ranch

All the people were stirring, it looked like a dance.

The ornaments were hung on the Christmas Tree with care

And carols, sweet music, filled the air.

A ranch style Christmas ornament hangs from the main tree in the lodge living room.

Then what to the children’s eyes would appear,

but Santa, yes Santa, with his red suite and his beard.

Santa hops off his sleigh to be greeted by kids and adults alike.

Away to the sleigh they tore like a flash,

And on their heels, their parents, all looking quite unabashed!

His eyes they twinkled, his cheeks were so red

This really could be the real Santa, young and old all said.

The luminaries were lighting the path to the lodge

And one and all made their way up to watch.

Santa and Mrs. Clause make their way to the lodge

A bag full of presents did Santa produced,

And name after name he called, though no list did he use.

Santa and one of the many children on ranch pose for a picture

The children sat captivated, not looking away,

Waiting to hear the next name that he’d say.

A child sits, captivated, waiting for his name to be called by Santa

And then with a twinkle from his piercing blue eyes,

The bag was empty and it was time for goodbyes.

Cookies were given, hugs were abundant,

They knew they had to let go, but the children were reluctant.

Freddy Wacker hugs Santa goodbye

It’s times like this that it become apparent,

That our belief in magic really is inherent

On this night, for young and old the same,

Merriment and family, are the name of the game.

Marjorie Kade, long time guest, laughs with Santa

Tica and daughter Sophia enjoy the merriment of their first ranch Christmas.

There will always be next year, if you are good,

Santa will be back with a lot more loot.

So until until that time comes, may your holidays be bright,

Merry Christmas to all and to all a good night!

Mrs. Clause sits on Santa's lap for a picture at the end of the evening.

The C Lazy U Ranch is proud to present to you our 12 Days of Christmas!

ON THE TWELFTH DAY OF CHRISTMAS C LAZY U GAVE TO THEE:

12 Tubers Tubing

12 tubers get excited for their first run down our tubing hill.

11 horseshoe players

11 horseshoe players stand around a giant snowman made of flour in the indoor arena during the first annual Christmas Horseshoe Tournament

10 Elves a’workin’

the traditional display of the 10 ranch elves, preparing for Christmas in the Lodge Lounge.

9 Bowls of Candy

The candy spread in the Outfitter's Cabin of the Ranch

8 happy kids

8 Kids sit on a sleigh being pulled by a snowmobile, heading out to go downhill tubing!

7 Wreaths a’hangin’

7 wreaths adorn the front of the lodge

6 Sledders Racing

Bruce, Bill Hansen and others race sleds down the ranch driveway.

… and because this was such a rare opportunity, here are a few more shots from the sledding photoshoot:

Another shot of our amazxing sledders- thanks gentlemen!

the men pose before taking off on their sleds

… 5 Wranglers Riding

Head Wrangler Bill Fisher, And Wrangler Tyler Klees out for a ride with the first of the winter wranglers.

4 Hockey Players

4 C Lazy U Ranch boys play hockey at night, on the freshly zambonied pond

3 moose a’munchin’

3 bull moose graze the sage brush by Shorty's arena

2 mules a’mushing

Horus and Jasper, pulling the ranch sleigh

And a Sicilian donkey in a Santa hat!

Petey prepares for the holiday season with a Santa hat.

The countdown begins- only 6 days until Thanksgiving, which means only 5 days to book your Thanksgiving Ranch Vacation at the C Lazy U Ranch! With snowshoeing, and cross country skiing, not to mention skating, hockey, snowmobiling and private down hill skiing, I find myself asking, who wouldn’t want to come for a visit?! AND, on top of that- the food! oh man is the food here great (yea, yea, I know that I primarily eat hay, so you must be thinking, “what does he know” but a connoisseur is a connoisseur, and I am one of food. All food. Any food.)

The chefs have been preparing their menu now for days, weeks even (it seems like that’s all they’ve been talking about!). AND, thanks to this donkey, for all those of you that are not fortunate enough to join us for the holiday, I will be stealing a copy of the menu for Thanksgiving, and reproducing parts of it here, with recipes, so that you all can have a little bit of the ranch with you at your home over the holidays… of course it won’t be exactly the same, because you won’t have me there too, but not everyone can be quite that fortunate.

The nights here lately are different than I can ever remember seeing them- every evening at around 9:30pm the whole world lights up with a blue hue that is anything but subtle (it’s as if a giant blue spotlight has been turned onto the world, truly, as it becomes as bright as day when the moon appears… but bright and blue). I’m not sure what causes the phenomenon, but I can say that I’ve never seen anything quite so romantic, so peaceful; and it seems as though every living thing feels it, because it has never been quieter here either-  even the coyotes don’t howl on nights like these. If someone were to take a stroll during once of these evening, they would feel as though they were surrounded by a sea of tiny lights that is the snow catching the radiant shining moon, reflecting it’s beauty in each crystal flake that lays on the ground, shimmering contently.

I wish that pictures could capture the sight, and the feeling of nights like these, but alas, they cannot. I do know that it is nights like this that remind me how we are the best of the best when it comes to Colorado family vacations- everything has it’s place, creating an atmosphere of incandescent happiness and content, but on nights like the ones we’ve been having lately, there is an entirely separate peace that can be had here.

My entry today is short- it’s Dale’s birthday (our Operations Manager) and I have to go give him his birthday present… the opportunity to pet me (I am so giving).

It was a clear, cold evening at the C Lazy U Ranch- my home for the past 30 years. As I made my usual end-of-day rounds, I heard a few of our staff members getting out of a truck, their talking and laughter rising into the evening air, echoing off the side of the hay barn, and reminding me, as I so often am, about how magical this place really is (a lot of credit for that should go to me… but who’s counting). “Odd,” I thought to myself, “this corral isn’t ever used in the winter, and is vacant now.” I changed my course to check things out further (I find humans often behave quite oddly, and usually don’t give much merit to their weird behavior, but this was odd enough to intrigue me).

Hiding behind a shed near the corral they entered, I watch them snap a few pictures of the nothingness within, and then head back to the truck. I withdrew further into the shadows of the shed so as to avoid discovery, and then they were gone, heading up the ranch drive. Listening for a moment to make sure that I was alone, I slowly made my way out of from behind the shed (or safe haven, I should call it- I would never have proceeded further had I known what was in store for me!).

Crawling my way under the empty corral fence, I walked towards the spot that the staff members had stopped.It had grown significantly darker since they had been here, and I blinked a couple of times to let my eyes adjust… I now wish that I hadn’t; hadn’t let my eyes adjust to see the horror; followed the kids into the corral; let my curiosity get the best of me! As my eyes

adjusted and I peered into the distance, I saw it, emerging from a shed that should have been empty:

The C Lazy U Ranch's Newest Member

I gasped! “What is it?! This is how I will meet my end!” and a million other thoughts ran, simultaneously through my little donkey mind. “I’m to valuable to die!” I tried to choked back a loud bray, but I’m only so strong. “HeeeHAAAWWW” echoed loud, and crystal clear in the frozen silence.

And suddenly, my historic, and important life flashed before my eyes as it noticed me staring in fear at it in the twilight hour, it’s large, long ,spear like  horns waiving about, threatening me to stay away. Well, needless to say, I ran out of there as fast as my little donkey legs could carry me (maybe people are right about my weight… I couldn’t get out of there fast enough, and my belly sure didn’t make matters any faster!)

Huckleberry plotting his next move

…

After an uneasy night of sleep I was able to recover my nerve and stroll the ranch today in search of some kind person that might give me some grain to help me recover further (who am I kidding, I could never diet), and all around the  ranch I heard them talking about the wickedness I encountered yesterday evening.

“Huckleberry is  so cute,” one girl giggled.

“That THING has a name?!”

“Yea, and totally loves having his photo taken- he’s a total lover, so sweet,” said a wrangler.

“Cute?! Sweet?!” what was I hearing? How are people supposed to enjoy their ranch vacation with this monster around! And now there is talk of putting it with the cows this summer! And in case people have forgotten, I love having my picture taken! What do we need that beast for?

I have to go sulk now.

8 inches of snow cover the ground, and pond keeps it's icy layer all day

It snowed all day yesterday, and is still chilly as can be today- lucky I’ve got my winter coat to keep me warm. But, for all those who don’t have the luxury of growing an extra couple layers of… insulation, shall we call it, I give you something almost as good- a C Lazy U Ranch comfort food recipe, compliments of our Executive Chef, Dennis (apparently it was good, because it’s all anybody would talk about… give me some good old hay any day, but that’s just me, I’m a simple donkey, with simple tastes)- comfort food, so I’ve been told, is great on days like this (to me all food is comforting, though, so I’m not 100% sure where that name comes from), so I thought it might be nice to add for all my loyal readers to try- this way y’all can have a piece of the ranch at your home!

Beef and Lentil Stew- The Ranch Way! by Dennis

We had some beef ribs hanging out, so I put them in the oven to roast. Then I cut up what we have come to call a mirepoix. Onions, celery and carrots. Cut to a size that will fit on a soup spoon. In the soup pot, I first sweat (simmer on medium heat in a bit of oil) the onions (because they need more cooking time). When the onions are translucent, add the carrots, celery and a good handful of garlic cloves.

We also had a box of mushrooms on hand, so some got chopped up and thrown in too. Cut up some tomatoes and in they go too. Cook this way down, long and slow, stirring occasionally, till all is nice and soft. Once your ingredients are soft, pull the beef bones from the oven and let them cool enough to handle them. Then cut off all of the meat and chop it up. (If you have enough time to simmer the bones till the meat falls off, this step is not necessary.)

So in go the bones and meat. Now the liquid, I like chicken broth. How much? Well, since we didn’t have any barley, which is really nice- mushroom, beef and barley soup- but we did have lentils, I put those in. They’ll soak up twice as much liquid as their own volume. If you put in 2 cups of lentils and 4 cups of liquid, by the time the lentils are cooked, you won’t have any liquid left. So just cover the whole thing by about four inches of liquid. Put in salt and pepper. Bay leaves and fresh thyme are good. You’ll need a good 2 hours of slow simmer, stirring every once in a while to make sure it isn’t sticking on the bottom.

Pull from the refrigerator a block of cheddar cheese. Cut it into one large chunk for each bowl of soup you are going to serve and warm your bowls. Heat up some crusty bread and have some butter on hand. (Add a dash of dry sherry to the soup just before serving.)